Posted by: Aya Thorgren | August 17, 2016

Emotional Abuse and Its Relation to Defending Your Rights

Emotional abusers work on breaking down your self- esteem. They have a way to manipulate you by suppressing, only giving approval when their ego is met. They make it very clear that if you don,t do it their way you will suffer and the only way to calm them down or to be accepted by them is to do what they say or give them what they want. Emotional abuse is very common, in fact our whole society is based on emotional abuse.

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The older generation and most of society overall is emotionally abusive. They can push you into a corner with laws, having you loose control of your destiny, then force you to do it their way and then additionally tell you that you are a looser of you don,t comply, making it perfectly well seem like you are and thus judging you and telling you that you made the “wrong” decision , since you didn,t obey and yield and then additionally be judged by the entire society. For example a woman that wants to be independent will be judged and looked down upon by every woman that depend on a man to make it and they will try and find a problem with you or envy your independence and almost celebrate when they see that this society ( especially in the latin world) will not that easily accept your independence and the last thing they are going to do is move for a change for independance for anyone, when they accepted dependance..

Emotionally abused people can become very cold and even choose emotionally abusive business and sentimental partners until they break that cycle through self -love due to the fact that they are used to being treated badly by society and family members, this includes only too many women and children. They live in fear of saying things as they are knowing that they will be punished somehow.

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The older generation is emotionally and physically abusive by tradition and in a few cases even justify sexual abuse. That is how they “rectify” and fix you, how they discipline you and that may be why people seem to have an inborn fear of standing up for themselves and their rights fearing punishment and social rejection.

Social rejection activates the same brain circuitry as physical pain.

Pay attention to how in our society women are expected to be self- effacing, available at all moments and resolve difficult situations, like putting food on the table regardless of if the society presents job opportunities or facilitate business, while the men are by culture allowed to be all over the place, doing wild and crazy things and being irresponsible and people find that charming. If a man sleeps aroung he is forgiven, if a woman looks for love she is burned at the stake. Being a good parent isn,t only about feeding your children and being there for them but also educating them, protecting their future, the environment and creating a healthy community, especially if and when the men are not.

So when you stand up for yourself, say no to the old ways and forge a new path, do what you feel and not what they say and expect of you, you may easily feel lonely and marginated. This is the way of society to tell you that who you are and what you are doing is not acceptable and if you keep doing it you will feel pain, suffer or be destroyed.

So don,t let them. It,s your life.

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Love & Light

Aya

 

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